I'll have the Genocide Club on wheat

Here in Tucson there is a restaurant called Chopped. It's pretty good, I guess. Lots of salad options. Tasty looking sandwiches. Delicious soup. Healthy. Pretty boring, I suppose.

I'd never been before and I went for the first time on Friday. I ordered the Mediterranean Salad. It had delicious feta, olives, that whole thing. But it also had sun-dried tomatoes. What is the deal with sun-dried tomatoes? Who likes these things? I don't understand why they still exist. Nobody I know likes them. They need to disappear, but they never will. Damn sun-dried tomato lobbyists...

But even more shocking and appalling than the sun-dried tomatoes was one of the sandwiches they offer. Not the contents of the sandwich, but its name. It was a bunch of boring ingredients and your choice of ham or turkey as the meat. The name? Sophie's Choice.

That's right. They named the sandwich after a movie about a holocaust survivor. Who, while living in a concentration camp, had to choose which of her two children would live and which would die. Then both children end up dying. And the woman commits suicide by the end of the movie.

In short, a totally fitting name for a sandwich offering the choice between ham and turkey. Here are some more potential menu items: Nuremburger, Anne Frankfurter, Geno-side salad...Shaved-Ham Private Ryan? If anybody sees these at Chopped, let me know so I can sue for royalties.

Sorry if I've already discussed this discovery with you, making my writing a rerun. It's just so bizarre that I had to share it with the world. Just like that growth I keep showing people.