Finger Lickin' Good
So today we got to tour the gross anatomy lab, aka The Dissection Room aka Cadaver Town. I have to admit, it was a bit creepy. It might take a day or two to grow accustomed to corpses. I kept imagining them moving and it was a little disturbing. Too many zombie movies I suppose...
Dr. Leadem says that cutting up dead bodies is not a natural act. He says that our society does not generally allow people to take apart bodies and gain from that action. My first thought was that President Shrub is currently encouraging it. But only if those bodies are from the Middle East. My second thought was, "I really want to give Leadem a hug."
More disturbing than the bodies, however, was a discovery in the lab. One of the instructors dissects a cadaver perfectly during the semester as an example of what the inside should like, when not dissected by a bunch of clumsy buffoons. He's an artist at what he does - it is very impressive. He was working on his "prosection," as it is called, while we were touring the lab. One of the other students suggested that I direct my gaze toward the instrument table at the feet of the cadaver under disection. On that table was a packet of barbecue sauce. I am totally serious - other students will back me up (I obviously made them check it out). This was a rather disturbing discovery. I suppose there are three explanations for this peculiar item.
First, the instructor may have a very dark sense of humour. This is the explanation I am hoping for, because it instantly makes him the coolest faculty member (remember, I was thinking of wearing a Let's get Crackin' lobster bib to my first day). He will add some much needed levity to the lab.
The second possibility is that he is so accustomed to working around corpses that he eats around them. I really hope this isn't the case. That would be pretty messed up. Especially if he was eating right next to the body. And I envision him working, then reaching over and grabbing a bite, then going back to work. Jibbly...
The third and final possibility is that he is a cannibal who has happened to find a job which lets him satiate his cravings. This is the most likely explanation.
Dr. Leadem says that cutting up dead bodies is not a natural act. He says that our society does not generally allow people to take apart bodies and gain from that action. My first thought was that President Shrub is currently encouraging it. But only if those bodies are from the Middle East. My second thought was, "I really want to give Leadem a hug."
More disturbing than the bodies, however, was a discovery in the lab. One of the instructors dissects a cadaver perfectly during the semester as an example of what the inside should like, when not dissected by a bunch of clumsy buffoons. He's an artist at what he does - it is very impressive. He was working on his "prosection," as it is called, while we were touring the lab. One of the other students suggested that I direct my gaze toward the instrument table at the feet of the cadaver under disection. On that table was a packet of barbecue sauce. I am totally serious - other students will back me up (I obviously made them check it out). This was a rather disturbing discovery. I suppose there are three explanations for this peculiar item.
First, the instructor may have a very dark sense of humour. This is the explanation I am hoping for, because it instantly makes him the coolest faculty member (remember, I was thinking of wearing a Let's get Crackin' lobster bib to my first day). He will add some much needed levity to the lab.
The second possibility is that he is so accustomed to working around corpses that he eats around them. I really hope this isn't the case. That would be pretty messed up. Especially if he was eating right next to the body. And I envision him working, then reaching over and grabbing a bite, then going back to work. Jibbly...
The third and final possibility is that he is a cannibal who has happened to find a job which lets him satiate his cravings. This is the most likely explanation.
posted by Montgomery at 4:25 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home