Long live the king
Bad news, readers. On 13 January 2009, Patrick McGoohan passed away. I'll give you a moment...
If you're like me, you're probably saying, "Who?" I don't blame you; for me, and probably most of you, he came a little before our time. One of the roles you might know him for is King Edward Longshanks from Braveheart, the movie which probably triggered Mel Gibson's lifelong love of torture.
But he is also famous for creating some British show called Danger Man. Normally I don't care for any British television that doesn't begin with "Monty Python" or end with "Flying Circus," but this particular "programme" had the theme song "Secret Agent Man," which really is a monumentous contribution to society.
I first remember hearing this song when Ace Ventura portrayed his over the top caricature of a character called Jim Carrey way back in 1995 when I was [number redacted] years old. It was also played in Austin Powers and Bowfinger. And if you remember hearing it in Bruce Willis' album "The Return of Bruno," I pity you more than I've ever pitied anyone.
On to the crux of my discussion - I have issue with one line in the song. In the song, Johnny Rivers (or, shudder, Bruce Willis) sings:
Odds are he won't live to see tomorrow? Are you serious? First off, how piss-poor was his training that he is more likely than not to die on any given day? Does he have some serious medical issues? Maybe he needs to see a doctor.
Second, let's take a look at the facts. To be a secret agent, you have to be what, at least 20-ish years old? How can you reach that age if you're 60% likely to die within a 24-hour period. Furthermore, he's got at most 2 missions in him before he reaches his "sell by" date - that's just not cost efficient for whatever government and/or corporation hired him. The Ways and Means Committee and/or accounting department would never let that happen.
No, the way I figure it, his odds of dying are at worst 4-to-1 against. Let's try it out:
RIP
Patrick "Gooey" McGoohan
19 March 1928 – 13 January 2009
If you're like me, you're probably saying, "Who?" I don't blame you; for me, and probably most of you, he came a little before our time. One of the roles you might know him for is King Edward Longshanks from Braveheart, the movie which probably triggered Mel Gibson's lifelong love of torture.
But he is also famous for creating some British show called Danger Man. Normally I don't care for any British television that doesn't begin with "Monty Python" or end with "Flying Circus," but this particular "programme" had the theme song "Secret Agent Man," which really is a monumentous contribution to society.
I first remember hearing this song when Ace Ventura portrayed his over the top caricature of a character called Jim Carrey way back in 1995 when I was [number redacted] years old. It was also played in Austin Powers and Bowfinger. And if you remember hearing it in Bruce Willis' album "The Return of Bruno," I pity you more than I've ever pitied anyone.
On to the crux of my discussion - I have issue with one line in the song. In the song, Johnny Rivers (or, shudder, Bruce Willis) sings:
There's a man who leads a life of dangerStop the music! There it was!
To everyone he meets he stays a stranger
With every move he makes another chance he takes
Odds are he won't live to see tomorrow
Odds are he won't live to see tomorrow? Are you serious? First off, how piss-poor was his training that he is more likely than not to die on any given day? Does he have some serious medical issues? Maybe he needs to see a doctor.
Second, let's take a look at the facts. To be a secret agent, you have to be what, at least 20-ish years old? How can you reach that age if you're 60% likely to die within a 24-hour period. Furthermore, he's got at most 2 missions in him before he reaches his "sell by" date - that's just not cost efficient for whatever government and/or corporation hired him. The Ways and Means Committee and/or accounting department would never let that happen.
No, the way I figure it, his odds of dying are at worst 4-to-1 against. Let's try it out:
There's a man who leads a life of dangerMuch better!
To everyone he meets he stays a stranger
With every move he makes another chance he takes
Odds are he's got an 80% chance to see tomorrow
RIP
Patrick "Gooey" McGoohan
19 March 1928 – 13 January 2009
posted by Montgomery at 5:25 PM
1 Comments:
Holy crap you're blogging again! Also, Ricardo Montalban died today.
KKKKKHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNN!
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