All-Hallow's-Eve Comments
This is just a list of random Halloween thoughts running through my head, now that it's over.
Costume ideas which Legal Counsel has assured guarantee me a spot in hell:
All last night I was wondering what the hell is up with Tootsie Rolls. Seriously, what are they? They aren't chocolate, they aren't taffy, they aren't feces and they aren't natural. The company history just calls them a "chocolatey, chewy candy." They don't even know what it is! And why are they rolls? I'll admit that they're tasty, sure. But only if you eat one or two of the tiny ones. After that, they start to get gross. And if you think about what they are while eating them, you'll go insane.
On a related note, Laffy Taffy comes in chocolate form now. Kickass.
A commercial on the radio told me to go to a costume party "Just for the howl of it." If you have a phrase like "for the hell of it," you don't need to spookify it. It already references the final resting place for the souls of sinners. At most, add emphasis to the word "hell." You also don't need to change "nightmare" to "frightmare." Think, people.
Corn mazes are awesome. But they should be called "Maize Mazes."
We're currently learning about the urinary system in class. My professor says she is wearing a Halloween costume, which consists of candy (rolos, mostly) taped all over her body. She says it relates to the urinary system. I don't want to know how. All I can think is "diabetes," since the sugar is escaping the body. And I'm praying she doesn't ask a student to go up and eat the candies off of her. Jibbly...
My mom had surgery on Halloween. That makes it a lot easier to dress as a mummy.
Halloween - Legal Counsel's favorite holiday - is done. Now it's Thanksgiving time - my favorite holiday. Except maybe Guy Fawkes Day...mmm, effigies...
Costume ideas which Legal Counsel has assured guarantee me a spot in hell:
1. Blue/deadguy makeup + masquerade mask = the new Mardi GrasThe worst Halloween candy ever is those taffy things wrapped in black or orange paper. So disgusting. I think they use that stuff to fill cracks in the Hoover Dam. Who buys that crap?
2. (for the ladies) Straw in mouth = Schiavo
3. I saw a quadriplegic dude wearing a Superman costume, so I instantly thought Christopher Reeves. You did too, admit it. I think he did it on purpose.
4. "Sad" drama mask + suit = I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby
All last night I was wondering what the hell is up with Tootsie Rolls. Seriously, what are they? They aren't chocolate, they aren't taffy, they aren't feces and they aren't natural. The company history just calls them a "chocolatey, chewy candy." They don't even know what it is! And why are they rolls? I'll admit that they're tasty, sure. But only if you eat one or two of the tiny ones. After that, they start to get gross. And if you think about what they are while eating them, you'll go insane.
On a related note, Laffy Taffy comes in chocolate form now. Kickass.
A commercial on the radio told me to go to a costume party "Just for the howl of it." If you have a phrase like "for the hell of it," you don't need to spookify it. It already references the final resting place for the souls of sinners. At most, add emphasis to the word "hell." You also don't need to change "nightmare" to "frightmare." Think, people.
Corn mazes are awesome. But they should be called "Maize Mazes."
We're currently learning about the urinary system in class. My professor says she is wearing a Halloween costume, which consists of candy (rolos, mostly) taped all over her body. She says it relates to the urinary system. I don't want to know how. All I can think is "diabetes," since the sugar is escaping the body. And I'm praying she doesn't ask a student to go up and eat the candies off of her. Jibbly...
My mom had surgery on Halloween. That makes it a lot easier to dress as a mummy.
Halloween - Legal Counsel's favorite holiday - is done. Now it's Thanksgiving time - my favorite holiday. Except maybe Guy Fawkes Day...mmm, effigies...
posted by Montgomery at 9:01 AM
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