You down with IBT?
Yeah you know me!
This weekend I went to IBTs with Legal Counsel, J-Bone and Paneera. I know, I know - it's about time I wrote about that place. If you don't know about it, IBTs is a gay bar on 4th Ave here in Tucson. If you've never seen it, I'm not surprised. Both the front and rear entrances are very well camouflaged. You have to draw a door on the wall with chalk and knock three times, Beetle Juice style.
It's like any other bar on 4th Ave - loud dance floor, quiter patio, several bars, videos of half to three-quarter naked men dancing and gay pride parades. It is a little techno-centric, though (as opposed to hip-hop/rap in most clubs I've gone to). If you're in there, it feels just like any other club. Except it's a total sausage-fest. Dudes everywhere.
The bartenders make really good drinks like Legal Counsel's favorite, the "Come Fuck Me" which tastes like pineapple fruit punch but is probably 90% alcohol. It's a house drink. Legal Counsel asked the bartender if he knew how to make it and he got all offended. That would be like asking Michael Jackson if he knows how to...sing "Beat it." You thought I was going there, didn't you? You're dirty...
One of the things I like most about the place is the people who go there. They generally seem like a better sort than those in most other clubs. They're not a bunch of horny people whose only goal is sex. Well, okay, maybe they are. But I don't have to worry about that - it's no so hostile and gross if you're straight in a gay bar. And they (generally speaking) seem cleaner and nicer. I also get to see some interesting outfits. Highlights of this trip - Sleeveless Flannel Cowboy and Captain Cutoffs (Tobias Funke style).
Probably the biggest perk of going to IBTs as a guy is all the gay men. It's like fishing for an ego boost. Gay men are more likely to hit on you than women since men are more aggressive. It's science. So I went there hoping I'd get hit on (I know, I'm a cock tease) and it totally happened! Sweet! Here's how it went down:
Random dude: Are you from Texas?
Montgomery: No. Why?
Random Dude: You have this sexy Texas nose thing going on. Hot.
Montgomery: Thanks!
For some reason I imagine gay men to have high standards, so that was a nice ego boost. I was really hoping for something along the lines of "are those mirror pants, because i can see myself in them" or "if I said you had a nice body, would you hold it against me" but this was good enough. When he said Texas, I was hoping for a Brokeback Mountain reference. Maybe next time. Legal Counsel beat me though. She got hit on twice. At a gay bar. Yeah, she's that hot.
All in all a fun time. The one bad part is that I'm a horrible dancer. I was told I dance like a straight guy. I don't want to dance like a straight guy! They suck at dancing! I've got so much to learn. I'll probably just stick with the robot...
This weekend I went to IBTs with Legal Counsel, J-Bone and Paneera. I know, I know - it's about time I wrote about that place. If you don't know about it, IBTs is a gay bar on 4th Ave here in Tucson. If you've never seen it, I'm not surprised. Both the front and rear entrances are very well camouflaged. You have to draw a door on the wall with chalk and knock three times, Beetle Juice style.
It's like any other bar on 4th Ave - loud dance floor, quiter patio, several bars, videos of half to three-quarter naked men dancing and gay pride parades. It is a little techno-centric, though (as opposed to hip-hop/rap in most clubs I've gone to). If you're in there, it feels just like any other club. Except it's a total sausage-fest. Dudes everywhere.
The bartenders make really good drinks like Legal Counsel's favorite, the "Come Fuck Me" which tastes like pineapple fruit punch but is probably 90% alcohol. It's a house drink. Legal Counsel asked the bartender if he knew how to make it and he got all offended. That would be like asking Michael Jackson if he knows how to...sing "Beat it." You thought I was going there, didn't you? You're dirty...
One of the things I like most about the place is the people who go there. They generally seem like a better sort than those in most other clubs. They're not a bunch of horny people whose only goal is sex. Well, okay, maybe they are. But I don't have to worry about that - it's no so hostile and gross if you're straight in a gay bar. And they (generally speaking) seem cleaner and nicer. I also get to see some interesting outfits. Highlights of this trip - Sleeveless Flannel Cowboy and Captain Cutoffs (Tobias Funke style).
Probably the biggest perk of going to IBTs as a guy is all the gay men. It's like fishing for an ego boost. Gay men are more likely to hit on you than women since men are more aggressive. It's science. So I went there hoping I'd get hit on (I know, I'm a cock tease) and it totally happened! Sweet! Here's how it went down:
Random dude: Are you from Texas?
Montgomery: No. Why?
Random Dude: You have this sexy Texas nose thing going on. Hot.
Montgomery: Thanks!
For some reason I imagine gay men to have high standards, so that was a nice ego boost. I was really hoping for something along the lines of "are those mirror pants, because i can see myself in them" or "if I said you had a nice body, would you hold it against me" but this was good enough. When he said Texas, I was hoping for a Brokeback Mountain reference. Maybe next time. Legal Counsel beat me though. She got hit on twice. At a gay bar. Yeah, she's that hot.
All in all a fun time. The one bad part is that I'm a horrible dancer. I was told I dance like a straight guy. I don't want to dance like a straight guy! They suck at dancing! I've got so much to learn. I'll probably just stick with the robot...
posted by Montgomery at 7:57 AM
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