Technophile
I've become completely dependent on technology. I can admit it. I probably spend 80% of my awake time using or near something electronic. I don't bring paper to class, I just use my laptop. I'll watch television or movies when cold chillin'. I've been slowly replacing all my friends with robot duplicates for years. Oops. If you're not a robot, disregard that - it's not going to happen to you. If you are a robot, you know what I'm talking about - and we'll get those others soon enough...
I've been displaying some symptoms of my addiction. It's a little scary. Here are some examples:
I was driving and saw a new car with no license plate on the back part (it was in the window, which I didn't see). I started thinking, "It's weird that they blur out the license plates on cars like that on TV. They did a good job with this one." Then I realized I was in the real world and felt embarassed. And now I share my shame with you.
I was in class during one of our breaks and as usual I was making fun of somebody. Specifically, I was doing that thing where I talk as though I am that person (i.e. "I'm D-Rock and I'm a big poopy-face"). As I was talking, I made the typing motion with my hands and fingers. I was promptly mocked, and rightfully so.
I was doing some studying - surprising, I know - which involved highlighting. I needed to highlight about three lines of text and the first thing my brain told me was start at the end of the text, then drag straight to the beginning (as though I was highlighting text in Word). I almost did it before realizing it wasn't a computer, and that I needed to highlight each line. Sigh.
Maybe I need to cut back. Then again, I can quit any time I want. Maybe you need to cut back! Or I'll cut you back! Get 'em, robots!
On an unrelated note, I was at Bentley's yesterday grabbing a beverage (Italian cream soda - so delicious) and I saw all the stuff you can mix in: sugar, honey, etc. There was a glass shaker with white powder in it which read, "Not Sugar." That's all it said. So I know it's not sugar, but what is it?? Salt? Parmesan cheese? Cocaine? You can't just say "not sugar" and give no indication of what it actually is. That's just mean. Now it's eating me up inside - I need to know what it is. Maybe there is a product actually called "Not Sugar™©®℗℠" that I don't know about. Can I get a coffee with two scoops of Not Sugar™©®℗℠? Thanks. Sorry, we only have the generic - Nix Carbohydrate.
I've been displaying some symptoms of my addiction. It's a little scary. Here are some examples:
I was driving and saw a new car with no license plate on the back part (it was in the window, which I didn't see). I started thinking, "It's weird that they blur out the license plates on cars like that on TV. They did a good job with this one." Then I realized I was in the real world and felt embarassed. And now I share my shame with you.
I was in class during one of our breaks and as usual I was making fun of somebody. Specifically, I was doing that thing where I talk as though I am that person (i.e. "I'm D-Rock and I'm a big poopy-face"). As I was talking, I made the typing motion with my hands and fingers. I was promptly mocked, and rightfully so.
I was doing some studying - surprising, I know - which involved highlighting. I needed to highlight about three lines of text and the first thing my brain told me was start at the end of the text, then drag straight to the beginning (as though I was highlighting text in Word). I almost did it before realizing it wasn't a computer, and that I needed to highlight each line. Sigh.
Maybe I need to cut back. Then again, I can quit any time I want. Maybe you need to cut back! Or I'll cut you back! Get 'em, robots!
On an unrelated note, I was at Bentley's yesterday grabbing a beverage (Italian cream soda - so delicious) and I saw all the stuff you can mix in: sugar, honey, etc. There was a glass shaker with white powder in it which read, "Not Sugar." That's all it said. So I know it's not sugar, but what is it?? Salt? Parmesan cheese? Cocaine? You can't just say "not sugar" and give no indication of what it actually is. That's just mean. Now it's eating me up inside - I need to know what it is. Maybe there is a product actually called "Not Sugar™©®℗℠" that I don't know about. Can I get a coffee with two scoops of Not Sugar™©®℗℠? Thanks. Sorry, we only have the generic - Nix Carbohydrate.
posted by Montgomery at 9:45 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home