It's a small world

But still an 8 hour drive to Anaheim.

This weekend, Legal Counsel and myself officially made our Disneyland Annual Passports worth the price. We drove to Disneyland and spent two days at the park. Cue the Happy Dance™. She really knows how to keep me happy (yeah, it was her idea). It's the greatest place ever. You'd think I would get sick of it, but I never want to leave.


Let me begin by describing the scam of the century. Most major theme parks try to sell you pictures of yourself on their rides. All in all, a good idea. A nice souvenir showing yourself and several strangers riding your favorite attraction. Well, Disneyland has your pictures prominently displayed for up close viewing. This created the potential for the money saving scheme shown above. Instead of buying the picture, I just use my camera to take a picture of the picture. Genius, right? People usually follow my example once they see it. It's a good way to save money and the cast members don't seem to care. Of course, this scam isunnecessaryy on my favorite ride.


Buzz Lightyear's Astro Blasters! One of the best Disney movies made into one of the best Disney rides. The premise of the ride is that you are a Space Ranger battling the Evil Emperor Zurg. I think he's a terrorist. Or his planet has oil. Either way. Onthee ride, you get a blaster which fires a laser. Hitting targets grants you points, and your points determine your rank. I, for example, am a Ranger 1st Class while Legal Counsel is a Space Scout. We rule! Your picture gets taken at some point (I'm usually way to into it to determine when) and they let you email it to yourself, which is an awesome idea. I don't even know if you can buy a print of it, so maybe it's bad for bidniss. Speaking of hot new rides:


This is Legal Counsel modeling in front of an add for the Monsters, Inc ride "Mike & Sulley to the Rescue." No, she's not the hot new ride. She's just hot. And don't worry, I strangled Sulley for being near my girl. Anyway, the ride is a slow kid ride which tells the whole Monsters, Inc story. It's not worth the crazy "new ride" line, but it is pretty fun. And it's good to see more Pixar rides (please don't kill Pixar, Disney). It's got the smell thing going: the sushi bar smells like a sushi bar (ginger), and the "lemon" snow cones from the Abominable Snowman smell like "lemon." And it has the "I tried to get away from it, but he picked me up with his mind powers and shook me like a doll" guy that I find so hilarious. The best part? Ride operators can see who's in each car, and they'll make Roz say something different based on the riders at the end of the ride. On the first trip, she complimented my brother's glasses. This time she talked to me! She said, "young man in the second row. You're quite a hunk. I'll be in your closet tonight. Just kidding." Score! By monster standards, I'm attractive! Take that, every girl at my high school! The next ride doesn't have monsters, but it is scary:


While a parade was going on, we were able to get on Small World alone. With nobody in the boats ahead of or behind us. Those dolls are terrifying, and they're even more scary when you don't have strength in numbers. I was worried that Chucky's brood would pick our bones clean like piranhas. But we made it out alive. Next time you're at Disneyland, make note of the fact that this ride is based entirely on stereotypes. On to another ride affiliated with stereotypes:


Legal Counsel's favorite: Splash Mountain! This ride always baffled me. It's based on a movie Disney refuses to release because of portrayal of Southern slaves/former-slaves. Couldn't they have come up with a different movie? One that's water related? And that they're willing to distribute? The Little Mermaid springs to mind. As it stands, however, we're going to have a generation of confused children. Ah well, it doesn't matter. I remember enjoying the movie and I know I enjoy the ride.

We decided to do Splash mountain before leaving for home. Legal Counsel wanted to be in the front, since we hadn't been seated there yet. She got totally soaked. I just watched the wave from the big drop rise up and drench her. She was like an adorable, shivering, wet mouse. So cute! But also full of spite. She made us go on again so I could sit in the very front. And this time I got an up close and personal view of the massive wave. The picture above is the aftermath. That and a long, moistened car ride home. During that ride we stopped at In n' Out and I saw this:


Bathroom stall graffiti done in bright pink puffy paint. That was a nice ending to the trip. It's comforting to see a vandal who is secure enough in his masculinity to work in a medium usually reserved for pre-teen girl sleepover t-shirt making. If that actually happens...

That's pretty much all I have to say about my trip. Thanks for sticking with me. I know it's not as entertaining as criticizing professors and Australians or singing the praises of Legal Counsel, but I felt like writing about it. Maybe tomorrow I'll write about why California sucks, or regale you with the Ballad of Walt Flannigan™. My blogging might die down a little this week since I need to study for a physio test. Then again, I have no will power. Especially when it comes to studying.