0.454 Kilogram Puppies
CNN Story o' the Day
Some no-goodnik was using puppies to smuggle heroin. They're the cutest little drug mules ever! Ten puppies were apprehended and six of those were carrying more than 3 kg of heroin (21 kg in puppy metric). The other four just gave in to puppy peer pressure and lied to be cool - "I totally swallowed those heroin balloons. It was ruff."
One of the puppies, known only as Scruff, seemed aloof during his arrest. "I'm a minor, it'll be off my record as soon as I turn 2.57." Long time mentor McGruff declined to comment.
I think the best part of the story is that they refer to them as "puppy smugglers." I haven't heard that term since I tried wearing a Speedo™ to the beach. It was also stated that they were using purebred labradors. Wouldn't that be way more expensive than a mutt? Purebreds are expensive. Maybe the drugs are worth more if they come from a purebred.
Dealer: Man, I've got some black tar bulldog-shih tzu.
Patron: Don't give me that bullshit, I needs the pure stuff. Labrador.
Dealer: Right away, Mr. Bush.
This article isn't all fun and games and cheap shots at the president. There's an adorable picture of puppies, but a little lower in the article it says that not all the puppies survived. Way to bring down the mood, CNN. They died just like Hendrix, man. Those puppies knew how to party...
On to livelier topics:
Hip-hop word o' the day: Grill
Definition o' the word: the teeth; also used in a general sense to refer to the face
Use o' the word: "I put my money where my mouth is and bought a grill" - Nelly; "Get the fuck outta my grill, bitch" - Montgomery
Etymology o' the word: arises due to the similar appearance of the front grill of the car and one's teeth. Especially if you've been hit in the face by a Cadillac
Some no-goodnik was using puppies to smuggle heroin. They're the cutest little drug mules ever! Ten puppies were apprehended and six of those were carrying more than 3 kg of heroin (21 kg in puppy metric). The other four just gave in to puppy peer pressure and lied to be cool - "I totally swallowed those heroin balloons. It was ruff."
One of the puppies, known only as Scruff, seemed aloof during his arrest. "I'm a minor, it'll be off my record as soon as I turn 2.57." Long time mentor McGruff declined to comment.
I think the best part of the story is that they refer to them as "puppy smugglers." I haven't heard that term since I tried wearing a Speedo™ to the beach. It was also stated that they were using purebred labradors. Wouldn't that be way more expensive than a mutt? Purebreds are expensive. Maybe the drugs are worth more if they come from a purebred.
Dealer: Man, I've got some black tar bulldog-shih tzu.
Patron: Don't give me that bullshit, I needs the pure stuff. Labrador.
Dealer: Right away, Mr. Bush.
This article isn't all fun and games and cheap shots at the president. There's an adorable picture of puppies, but a little lower in the article it says that not all the puppies survived. Way to bring down the mood, CNN. They died just like Hendrix, man. Those puppies knew how to party...
On to livelier topics:
Hip-hop word o' the day: Grill
Definition o' the word: the teeth; also used in a general sense to refer to the face
Use o' the word: "I put my money where my mouth is and bought a grill" - Nelly; "Get the fuck outta my grill, bitch" - Montgomery
Etymology o' the word: arises due to the similar appearance of the front grill of the car and one's teeth. Especially if you've been hit in the face by a Cadillac
posted by Montgomery at 9:15 AM
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